I have struggled to get out of bed the past two months. Pushing myself to take care of business has been daunting. I am blessed to have a staff that is supportive and understanding of both my situation and my chemical challenges.
Situational depression is one thing, chemical depression is altogether another. It invades my thoughts, my ability to rationalize and takes away hope. If you have experienced this you understand. If not you will be critical, think that if she "ate better, exercised, took vitamins, prayed harder, went to church, wasn't getting divorced, worked more, worked less, wasn't going to school, just went to school and gave up her business, gave up school and just ran her business, got in the outdoors, will feel better when it's summer, reached out more"...and on and on and on it goes. The advice and know-it-all-do-gooder's are endless. I appreciate them. They mean well.
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| Mangy damned black dog |
Everyone has an opinion, everyone has good intentions of what another SHOULD do with their lives. I take no offense, they're probably right, I've tried them all! And I still seem to catch this damned black dog. Hate him, loathe him, fear him much much more than death...but endure him I shall!
For those of you who now, or any time in the past, have experienced depression in any degree, my deepest love and compassion goes out to you. I get it and this too shall pass.
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| Zion. Look at the compassion in her eyes. By my side for 9 years. |
My only advice today, get a dog. ;) Good for the soul, depression or not.
You have many fans, allies, and friends Lor! Sharing your your stuggles, and battles with us, gives us hope and insight into better understanding this illness.You show us how it can be fought not only with meds, counciling. and unbelievabe courage, but also with love, and compassion for others. Your desire to blog your experience to the world in hopes of helping just one person win this battle with depression, and still find joy in their life is selfless!
ReplyDeleteYou are very much appreciated!! "YOU, MY FRIEND ARE A SAINT!!!" Thank you for sharing!!!!! <3
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ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing. I watched my dear nephew struggle with this and he lost the fight. Please don't ever give up. I know you from 30 years ago, and I remember the wonderfully kind person you are.
ReplyDeleteLove reading your posts!!! There must be 2 "black dogs" for one often haunts me too. I do have a little dog... Means the world to me and loves me unconditionally to the fullest extent. Life is a battle field, but I am a warrior! Love to you always!
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