Happy Birthday Baby

My baby turns 20 today! No more teenagers? I’m not sure if I should celebrate or cry.

Tandin, this beautiful child has always been a joy. Actually, I take that back, I can think of times playing golf with him when he was 9 or 10 that was miserable because if he was not playing well, we ALL paid. He has always had high expectations of himself and the pressure he would put on himself, was and always will be, much worse than what we as his parents could ever impart. Maybe this is typical of the youngest in the family?

Tan is in the civil engineering program at the University of Utah and is considering a double major in architecture. It is all highly confusing to me.I look at his homework in complete awe. He is a very intelligence boy and I laugh that I bore this beautiful child. I find it unusual that his sensitive and emotional side is highly developed as well. Traditionally, what we find with the “techy people” is they are less emotionally in tune with themselves and others. Contraire for Tandin, he is the go-to person for advice with friends, and he is very much aware of our family and how it all spins. The nice thing about my Tan is he seems to keep it all in check. He is an excellent observer. We have coined the word “Tandinism”, because even at the tender age of 20, he seems to create rare passages of wisdom that have great depth, meaning and humor all in one. My blog is actually full of Tandinism’s. This boy seems to have this subtle, powerful effect everywhere he goes.

I look forward to the next 20 years of loving this boy, seeing his dreams come true, watching him build his buildings and share more of his subtle insights that so powerfully affect everyone around him…particularly me…Happy birthday baby!

A Sneaker Allegory

My son is a "Sneaker Head". We are celebrating 22 years today with this "Sneaker Head", miracle son of ours. I say miracle because at 8 months old I left him in the bathtub, with the water running. I took a business phone call and 12-15 minutes later I frantically hung up and ran to the bathtub where I discovered him unconscious floating face down in the tub. I revived him by giving him CPR with help from a 911 dispatcher and today he walks perfectly and happily so long as he has a pair of authentic Jordan collector sneakers on his feet. His mind works perfectly as well, he can talk brilliantly about any subject that interests him...particularly sneakers.

Chase is the type of person that likes what he likes. That seems like a 'cliche', that everyone is like that. I beg to differ. I'm not so sure. This is NOT to say that Chase is black and white or judgmental in any way. On the contrary. He is one of the most loving, tender-hearted people I know. But his feet are firmly planted on certain things that are favorites of his.

I like where Chase is headed in life. He has learned from some very difficult roads.

We ALL make choices for good and ill. I believe that we can learn from everything that we go through if we look for the 'life lessons'. Chase has shown that in his young life he has an awareness far beyond his years.

Choice is a divine teacher, for when we choose we learn that nothing is ever put in our path without a reason. Iylana Vanzant

Sometimes we have to get up and go...and other times we don't. Sometimes we stay down awhile and figure out what there is to learn while we are on the pavement, the stony path, amongst the thorns and thistles. There is usually more to learn while we're down--than there is while we are skipping merrily along our way. But, eventually we all MUST get up again, and put one foot in front of the other.

A knowledge of the path cannot be substituted for putting one foot in front of the other. M. C. Richards

I'm sure Chase has had times where he felt alone in his "wilderness". Most of us have walked through some pretty dark and ugly wilderness and we all felt very alone. I believe Chase knows that I was always very close, even though maybe he could not see me. The truth is we are never really alone. When we go through our own dark wilderness there is sure to be a promised land on the other side.

The Promised Land always lies on the other side of the wilderness.
Havelock Ellis

I love this child just like I love all my children. We ALL learn through our bumps...and we are always the better for it. Some people choose to pretend they never have any bumps in life (ego maniacs), some don't for a time (luck eventually always runs out). Some people choose to deny they ever have any bumps on their road (the head in the sander's). Some may think they can go around their bumps (the avoider's). I don't recommend any of these. I've been and done them all. They're painful. There is one REAL road on this journey called life, THROUGH IT. You are the better for it when you just GRIN and LEARN, and CRY a little along the way. It's the higher ground.

Bless not only the road but the bumps on the road. They are all part of the higher journey. Julia Cameron

Happy birthday my son and I am looking forward to our new journey together at the "U".

I was wondering...could you buy ME a new pair of really cool sneakers for your birthday so you'll be proud to be seen with me? Just wondering?

Our Journey

It has been a journey, after 25 years together, it has definitely been a journey.

My husband, Kelly turns 48 today. We don't always celebrate these "HAPPY BIRTHDAY'S" anymore, for they seem to have sped up and now we say, like most people our age, "Where has all the time gone?"


If you do not watch/listen to the YouTube video, allow me just a few lyrics:


..."Faded wedding photographs"...My favorite, that's T.J. at 4 years old in the middle of us.



..."Our children all have grown"... Each their own person, on their way to a life. Their life was molded out of ours, but they each have chosen their own individual ways and we like that. We have allowed them individuality and an opportunity to express themselves. We hope without too much pressure to be anything more or less than who and what they are, and want to become.



..."Mountains we have climbed to get this far"......This one was memorable. A short hike, a picnic, some nice music, a long talk, and of course Zion, along for the journey.

..."We learned to take the laughter with the tears"...Enough said.

..."You stood by me, days and nights that I was gone"...I'm not talking about when I was out of town, it was all the times that my mind was not present. Again enough said.

..."You sacrificed, believed in me, and you stood strong...

..."Cause with our love there's nothing left to fear...

...After all these years...

Happy birthday honey and I will love you forever,
your Wildflower

Within the Silver Lining

Happy Birthday Beautiful Child of Mine! T.J.(Tyson Joe) we call him Teej, I'm into one syllable names, is 28 years old today. I actually had him the day before Thanksgiving. So at 17 years old I spent my Thanksgiving in the hospital. I remember after I had him I was so excited so to celebrate I ate the hospitals Thanksgiving dinner shortly after delivery, in which it came up as quickly as it went down.

Even though at 16 I was devastated to find myself pregnant this child was the delight of my life. We seemed to form a bond early in life possibly because I was a child raising a child. He intuitively was so concerned for me and I was a protective Mother Bear of him. When he was 3 years old we lived with my parents and he played his rendition of happy birthday to me on the piano including vocals. Priceless!

I would say that life has not been easy for Tj or even for me for that matter. I'm not crying the blues one bit, what I am saying is that this IS LIFE. We have been very happy through the challenges. Happiness is a CHOICE. Bitter and ornery people are a pain.

My sister shared something with me just the other day that I thought was very profound: What are you willing to let go of in order to get what you want. T.J. had to let go of a drug habit. This is a big question for many of us. One that I suggest we all contemplate...

T.J.'s journey has only just begun, he has his whole life ahead of him and it looks as if amongst his tough beginning there is a silver lining...