The Answer Always Lies Within

One month from now I will have completed four consecutive semesters at the University of Utah. My life and perspectives, my routines and overall thinking about many things in life have changed, quite dramatically.

I was introduced to Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs 25 years ago when I attended Weber State College and was lucky enough to get more acquainted with several different approaches to understanding myself and others behaviors on this go around at school. 

I suppose at some time or another we evaluate what we want, how we are doing, and if, and CAN we make changes in our lives to improve our lives? All of these questions can be asked and answered depending on where we lie in this pyramid from Abraham Maslow. If your love/belonging needs are not being met your motivations will be much different than if it is esteem you are seeking. It is highly doubtful you will be worrying much over what others think of you when you or your family is starving.

It is proposed that many rarely, if ever reach self-actualization.

The answer to this question only lies within yourself. I am responsible only for myself and you are only responsible for you. However when we reach a point of self-actualization we 

become part of something greater than ourselves and with that life becomes something much more meaningful, something richer beyond the borders of oneself. 

It's a brain twister, but worth the thought...

Oh No Not the R Word!

My recommendation? Don't do it! Tandin says, "Don't set your expectations too high, then you won't be disappointed."

Resolutions. I've done 'em. Oh believe me, I have stacks of planners with goals, New Year’s resolutions, schedules, have to, should's, want to's and could's.

I started my career, and launched my business with Tony Robbins chatter in my brain! You don't know who Tony Robbins is? He went from a homeless guy living out of his car to a millionaire hopelessly in love in less than a year! Ha! What an idol for an idealistic 23 year old business woman on fire!? I was an idiot!!!

A clip of Tony Robbins...if you dare:

Actually I like Tony Robbins, I have just found the softer approach works better for me...

So I write affirmations. Ahhh, you thought I'd given up on this form of self actualizing altogether? NEVER! (Unless I'm depressed, then it all goes to hell) Anyway an affirmation is a positive statement written to you about yourself as if it is already true.

Example: I always eat healthy and delicious food to keep my body and brain working in tip top condition!
(This is NOT exactly how one of my affirmations would read; it would be even a LITTLE too far-fetched for my cookie loving sub conscious mind to believe)

So the whole idea in life is learning how to set yourself up to win…If resolutions and goals work for you, GO FOR IT.

Otherwise you may want to try the softer side and not use the "R" word!

Fall is my Nature

I for one am glad this summer is over! It has been a ROCKY one and there was not a single hike included with those rocks.

One positive note, my skin is thanking me for it actually saw very little of the sun. I suppose I was what you could almost call, a shut-in. Oh that sounds awful and it was for the most part. How much of it was situational and how much was chemical? Hard to say, but I've had experience with both and there was a lot going on for me on both ends.

Here are some things I learned:

1. You can't hurry through pain, you can't bury it and you can't go around it.
2. It takes an immense amount of self discipline to let things be.
3. Letting go is hard.
4. Forgiving is hard.
5. You can think too much, say too much, write too much, but rarely can you listen too much.

When I Fall...I Fall hard. It is not my nature to do things half way.

But I always get up...

My Big BLUe Berry Pie Mouth

Oh my I have been acting not so smart! In fact all this awareness that I speak of...ummm, not doing so well. I certainly did not wake up and think, "How am I going to enable this that is really not good for this person I love so much?" I did not see it! My heart is good, at least I think it is. Sometimes emotions are just SO strong and we do what we think is best given the information we have at hand, and where WE are at emotionally at the time, plays into it as well. I'm not perfect and last time I checked you didn't have to be either. Now there's a consolation.

How difficult it is to be a parent sometimes and yet it is the greatest joy we will ever know...and suffer. And we do it willingly and we would do it over and over again because of the great reward of the purest love their is of parent and child.

Maybe in your circumstances it does not seem this way. It can also be the cause of one of the most painful and confusing unresolved issues that we deal with or rather do NOT deal with over a life time. I believe if we don't deal with it at some point and fix it, it gets handed down from generation to generation. Thus the label dysfunctional family was born! I haven't met a dysfunctional family I haven't liked. Come to think of it I haven't met a family that is not dysfunctional!

I'm so sorry for the dumb things I have said and done lately. I am sometimes a 'know-it-all' in some areas of life, other areas I'm as dumb as a rock. I just got humbled and as my husband says (or some sports talk show host that he listens to too much ;)) SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE! In which he knows I really would much rather eat a big piece of BLUe berry pie!