Lessons from a Dog Part III

This should be entitled "Lessons from All My Dogs," and i've had a few..all unique, all special.

Gizmo came to our home because TJ my oldest son, as a 7th grader, desperately wanted a dog. Gizmo was a 4 year old Pug that had just delivered a batch of pups. When she walked into the house with her teets nearly dragging on the ground and worn out from nursing i thought to myself, "what have we got ourselves into?" But her flat nose pug face grew on us and her nipples finally shrunk. My 3 boys loved her and we eventually bred her again and she gave birth to 6 of the cutest puppies you could ever imagine. Gizmo got old and she died in my arms on the way to the vet. I had unknowingly ran over her while she camped her fat self in our drive way. There were no back up cameras back then. Lesson 1: Pay attention to your surroundings. Your actions impact others.

Next came Zion. My Savior Dog. She was all of 4 inches when i brought her home from my "self-discovery trip at 40 years old" to Zion's Canyon. Zion lived 14 years. She played soccer like no other. She could navigate a ball better than any professional soccer player. She even played when she was blind in her last couple of years with us. Lesson #2: Don't let a disability get in the way of having fun. In truth, if we look in the mirror, we all are disabled and have hardship in one way or another.


Roxee and Doxer came next, only a few short months after Zion. Dozer the snaggle toothed Bulldog and Roxee, a crazed runt Boston that spent a lot of time hiding in the closet, simply because when we got her she was near death from an infection in her tail (she had surgery and in time she was a happy healthy dog). She was irritable because she was in pain a lot of the time. That changed in time when her Bulldog brother Dozer, followed her everywhere protecting her from her uncontrollable self. She would jump out of the car window and Dozer would go round her up; scold Roxee and then take her potty in the back yard. They were a pair. They wrestled uncontollably at times with Dozers entire mouth covering her face. They loved each other and they died together in TJ's house fire. Lesson #3:
Get over your pain any way you can and find a trusted partner that looks over you, even if you do dumb things.

Pac healed our hearts from the loss of Dozer and Roxee. His beautiful face and prestine body still turns peoples heads to this day. Pac is now 7 years old and still is a one-man-dog, Tandin is the only one he obeys. No one can control him but Tandin (youngest son of mine). When he visits me he runs furiously, only to say, "my dad, is the only one i respect, the rest of you can go to hell." Lesson #3: You earn loyalty by serving undonditionally, even when it's hard.

Ducati cleaning Cayennes ears

Ducati and Cayenne came shortly after Pac to fill the loss of Dozer and Roxee. TJ (my oldest son) buys in bulk, Having two dogs helped entertain each other and accommodate TJ's busy lifestyle. After losing Dozer and Roxee, Ducati and Cayenne filled that void for TJ. Two more dogs that were paired liked no other. Ducati liked to fight, then she'd lick Cayenne's ears clean.. Lesson #4: Fight like you mean it, then kiss and make up!

For a short 3 weeks we had Winslow. Kevin and i bought this little Aussie-doodle antincipating that Zion was getting near the end and i needed to let her go. Unfortunately on a mid day at the office, Winslow invaded Ducati's eating territory and perished under his large jaws. Lessons learned...dogs are not people, they inately protect their territory, but do not know their boundaries and sometimes things don't turn out so well. Winslow died in my arms as well. Lesson #5: Watch your back, your friends sometimes turn on you, and you will be surprised that is often the ones closest to you.

Winslow

The last night i slept with Zion

One of the hardest things i have ever had to do in my life was to take my most precious companion that had loved me unconditionally and served me for 14 years was on January 17, 2018. I knew it was Zions time to have rest. She died in my arms also, of my choosing, which was best for her...not for me. I had hung on to her too long. She had been blind for 2 years and i carried her most everywhere the last 6 months of her life. This dog had been through more life and strife with me than any other living thing on this earth, and oh how i hated to let her go! Lesson #6: Hold on to those you love, you never know when they are going to be gone.

Five days later i got Daisy, or better known as "Crazy Daisy." She comforts me, and she makes me crazy, she is not an easy dog like Zion was, but i love her all the same. She's funny and has personality plus! Lesson #7: Crazy is ok. It makes life more interesting.

My Crazy Daisy

Each dog and each relationship that comes into our lives teaches us different life lessons. I have heard many times that once someone loses their most beloved pet that they cannot bare to lose another and they chose not to get another dog. That was not the case for me. Daisy does not take the place of Zion, no other dog will EVER replace my Zion. Daisy is just another part of the story of the lessons from a Dog. Lesson #8: If you pay attention every day brings some lesson that can either make your life better or worse. You choose.

Let Go

Recently i have been listening more and talking less..and i needed to stop talking! I have also taken more time to listen to music and read. I came across this passage from Eckart Tolle, one of my favorite authors.

"The egoic self is always engaged in seeking. It is seeking more of this or that to add to itself, to make itself feel more complete. This explains the ego's compulsive preoccupation with the future. Whenever you become aware of yourself "living for the next moment," you have already stepped out of that egoic mind pattern, and the possibility of choosing to give your full attention to this moment arises simultaneously. By giving your full attention to this moment, an intelligence far greater than the egoic mind enters your life."  --Eckart Tolle

Change always brings about relflection. I change every day. Life has a way of teaching us -- humbling us. How grateful i am to have eyes to read and ears to hear the beautiful lyrics and melodies of music.

How grateful i am to have 3 stalwart sons. How lucky i am to be close to all 3. I am blessed they have wives that love them and stand by them through all of lifes challenges. And the sweetest part of this stage of life is being "grams" to 2 perfect grandsons.

Bode - getting so big at 8 months

Collin -
 on one of our train rides at Lagoon

 And my very best friend, confidante and mentor is my mom.

My Mom with Bode at 3 months old

I can't ask God for much more. Well, accept Daisy!

Crazy Daisy

Lesson from a Dog Part II

On January 17, 2018 i euthanized Zion, my most beloved Boston Terrier that had been by my side for 14 years. She had been through more life with me than any human could have endured with the ups and downs of my crazy life. Only a dog could have been so loyal and patient with me. She was my best friend and confidante.

Dogs are unconditionally loving, and those of us who have them in their lives are blessed! I still miss Zion every day, for what she taught me was priceless. I miss her skinny body curling up by my tummy at night. And i know that life changes and life goes on!

My last pic with Zion. January 17, 2018

Three months later I now have Daisy. Crazy Daisy! I got her 4 days after i let Zion have her peace in heaven. Crazy Daisy has brought me so much joy.. she is a challenge, for she is a puppy. It has been a lot of lost sleep, hundreds of dollars, (laptop cords, phone charger cords, earbuds, you name it, she chews it). She has pooped and peed in my house and at work, thank goodness, it is rarely anymore. Yay progress! We are enrolled in puppy school. I am a committed dog owner, and i love my dogs. Those who have puppies and say that they were house broken in 5 days, never chewed anything and their dogs don't bark? I call bullshit.

It's funny because as dog owners we kinda like to stick to the breeds we love. When Zion was declining i was determined to find another runt Boston. When i wised up, i knew that was a self defeating-no-win situation. I now love Daisy! She is totally different than Zion. Zion was as low maintenance as they come. Daisy's nickname is "StinkenStein" for she needs a bath 2 times a week. She needs to go to the groomer, i never spent a penny on Zion at the groomer. Daisy is a YorkiPoo. She is adorable when she is groomed, and she does look like she is a homeless beggar when she goes 7 days without a bath..and i'm a little busy these days, so that happens! Perspective people, she is a dog.

"StinkenStein" before her blow dry

Daisy AKA "StinkenStein" after her blow dry

I posted 10 life lessons you can learn from your dog when Zion died. As life goes we have many lessons to learn.

http://wildflowersandweeds.blogspot.com/2018/02/lessons-from-dog.html when Zion died.

Tonight i only have 3 lessons from a (my) dog:

1. Don't underestimate the enthusiasm, innocence and strength of youth, they are our future. Puppies, millennial's, they all get a bad rap. I love them. The rules still remain the same; those who are willing to work hard and pay the price, rise to the top and are frankly delightful, and it takes working together to create that!

2. Be who you are and tell the truth. Dogs have a strong sense about things, and i believe i do as well..I found out in puppy class that dogs can smell 15 miles away and can hear 3 miles away! WOW, i wish i had that much instinct. We humans distort the truth and twist things around; we also justify our bad behavior, it's just the way it is. Dogs are always, just dogs.

3. Don't bite the hand that feeds you. I've been a business owner or boss for most of my life. It's not a popular job. The rule is, those who leave their employment will put blame on the boss or the company, and take no responsibility themselves, that is human nature. Personal accountability is a hard thing. Daisy bites me all the time, she's young, she's learning, and with good training, lots of love and consistency, she will grow out of it and realize that i am the one who takes care of her and loves everything about her, even when she is a challenge, because that is what unconditional love is.

Zion was as feisty as they come and her teeth were razor sharp, but in time they dulled and she learned her manners. In my eyes Zion was the perfect dog. I miss her every day. Daisy and i are learning together. She doesn't replace Zion. I have plenty of love for her too, that's the way love is.

This was in 2008, when both Zion and i were young!

And i love my Crazy Daisy!

A priceless moment when Daisy is quiet and has exhausted herself!

Lessons from a Dog

I'm writing about Lessons from a Dog. Not just any ordinary dog! My dog Zion. On Wednesday January 17 at 9:30 a.m. i walked numbly into the animal hospital with my best friend and companion that had been with me through so much life. Fourteen years of it. I am a totally different woman today and Zion was there for the entire journey.

This was no ordinary dog. Her namesake came from a "soul searching" trip at 40 years old when i had to get away from my life and start figuring out what was wrong with me and why was i not happy? It was on that trip that i returned home with Zion, all 4 inches of her. She was the runt.

We went to Zion's Canyon in May 2017. I knew it would probably be the last time i would take her there.

At 40 I had everything life seemed to offer, wonderful children, good-looking husband, successful business, beautiful home, nice cars, and lots of friends. I took my kids to church every Sunday and i had an abundance of family around me. So why was i not happy? I started this blog a few years after getting Zion which chronicles my life lessons and the events that took place to get authentic with myself. Zion was my one constant sidekick. She brought me joy. She comforted me. She made me laugh and she played, boy did she know how to play, that girl could play soccer like nobody's business!

In time everything changes. I knew it was time to let Zion go, frankly i had held on to her too long. It had been such a hard decision to make. She hadn't been in any pain, but at 14, stone cold blind, disoriented most of the time and me dragging her everywhere i went, well, i guess, she was tiring of life. The last few days she was barking (which she rarely did). and then putting a soccer ball in front of her and her ignoring it, that was my cue, she was ready to go home...and oh how i wanted to keep her!

It's interesting to think about all the things that a dog teaches you... as for me, here are the wonderful things that Zion, this beautiful creature taught me:

1.  Accept life as it IS.

2. Play hard. (Maybe you should get yourself a pink ball?)

3. Trust your instincts. I can guarantee you they're probably right.

4. Cuddle at night with someone you trust. It will make your life longer, and the life that you live more satisfying.

I will miss this. We did this every night. What a blessing she was!

5. Talk and sing to your Dog. They listen.

6. Don't worry about what other people think and about what you look like. Zion was skinny and a short-hair. She had numerous coats, winters were hard on her. This last winter, i bought her a pantsuit. When i walked into work with her in that pantsuit, TJ said, "is that dog wearing pants? followed up with a comment to my assistant, "would you put your dog in some shit like that?!" We've laughed about that numerous times!

This was the last coat i bought her just before Christmas for our trip to Arizona. I knew her time was drawing near. I did not know how close. I will cherish that time with her forever!

7. Be vulnerable. Dare to be dependent. Zion depended on me to care for her and in turn she served me more than i served her. It formed Trust. Not neediness. Trust. We humans could learn something from this.

8. Choose to be happy. When you think about it, and process through life's experiences you have 2 choices. You can choose to accept things as they are and be happy, or fight against what is, and be miserable. Zion was always happy, and she had a pretty pampered life, but i was the lucky one to have her!

9. Love unconditionally. No matter how many mistakes i made, Zion was the one constant in my life for 14 years, who loved me unconditionally. She was there, without question, every time. No matter what. Unconditionally.

10. Get another Dog! There will NEVER be another ZION. No not ever. And my heart has room to love another. This little white ball of fur is my angel. I named her Daisy. Daisies make me happy, they are my favorite flower.

Daisy is adjusting quite nicely to her new office home.

This post is dedicated to all those dog lovers who have loved one and lost one. Life goes on. They will never be forgotten, for they marked their spot in more ways than one!

Zion was loved by many. My heart still aches for the bond i had with her. R.I.P. baby girl.

This picture was taken by my Mom when she would watch her and obviously spoil her!

Lessons from Tandin

I wrote my first blog on May 15, 2008 entitle "Just Grey." A part of it reads..."the day outside looks promising. Blue skies, light winds. I on the other hand am still grey. My chest feels heavy. I battle a frequent sting behind my eyes that spans into my nose as I fight back another trickle of tears. A flood of tears might make me feel better. The flood will not come."

Since that time i have written 245 blogs about a myriad of subjects mostly about the journey of life's lessons: happiness, sadness, loss, illness, family, work, success, love, divorce, dogs, friends, judgment, narcissism, pain, relationships, unconditional love, perspective, differences, death, addiction, acceptance, entitlement, and thank heavens humor! God love HUMOR!

In my writing i have been very candid and painfully honest about feelings. My writing has been my therapy. I have kept a diary/journal off and on most of my life. Blogging has been my way of, "over-sharing" in the name of an attempt to reach others and share life lessons. Maybe you will read my words and say -- "i get it".. or "me too!"

Ten years ago social media didn't really exist. It certainly didn't govern our lives and we didn't have to constantly check our screens to compare our lives to see if we, looked as good as someone else, or were having as much fun, or were as successful as our "friends"...or so it APPEARS.. Right??

Well today, i'm lying in bed taking the day off, feeling a little under the weather, for i did stand on snow in my cute little red boots -- freezing (after all i was going to Deer Valley, so i wanted to be fashionable, rather than warm, stupid mistake!).

Friday night I spent a great evening with Tandin, my youngest son, watching the aerial competition finals at Deer Valley. It was spectacular watching these athletes twist and turn through the air. The mountain was lit up, the cameras and subwoofer base beat was enough to make your heart pump a little faster. It was complete with a fireworks finale, everything was beautiful and surreal...And then the drudgery of fighting the drunken, impolite, self-center imbeciles, all clamoring to get on the shuttle back to Park City. We missed the first bus because Tandin was not willing to RUN to the bus, let's just say, he was a bit angered by me pulling on his sweat shirt because i wanted to get on that damn bus! We did manage to catch the second bus.


I suppose each time i write i try to "make a point" and this time is no different. I learn the most poignant things from my boys. Last night was no different. And here are the lessons from the night: 1) Suffer through even if you're a little cold and uncomfortable. Many do not have homes, and are cold all night. 2) Don't make your loved ones uncomfortable because of what YOU want. Was it really important that i get on the first bus? Nope, and pulling on Tandin's sweatshirt made him uncomfortable, for he is polite, and i was being self-centered and impatient. Thank God that my boy thinks enough of me to invite me to spend a Friday evening with him. Period. 3) Appreciate athletes that are disciplined enough to dedicate themselves to excel at something that make crowds of people gasp at their talent, guts and bravery. True excellence in anything takes absolute sacrifice.

I've learned many things from my boys. They are all so incredibly different. I work for my oldest son TJ, and god love his soul, he puts up with me being in his business (literally) day after day. I pinch myself because i am so lucky to get to work with him every day. He was my night in shining armor, he picked me up when i was down and I am in awe of his work ethic and integrity.

My tender Chase gets me to the core, and i get him - we are birds of a feather. I can truly say i have never known a more non-judgmental, selfless person than Chase, all i can say is his wife is a lucky lady and i am a blessed mom.

My baby, well he's not a baby anymore, he's such a deep human being, far beyond what my genes could have produced, and i'll keep him, and keep learning from him. He is emotionally and intellectually wise beyond his years. I am humbled to be his mom.