Lessons from Tandin

I wrote my first blog on May 15, 2008 entitle "Just Grey." A part of it reads..."the day outside looks promising. Blue skies, light winds. I on the other hand am still grey. My chest feels heavy. I battle a frequent sting behind my eyes that spans into my nose as I fight back another trickle of tears. A flood of tears might make me feel better. The flood will not come."

Since that time i have written 245 blogs about a myriad of subjects mostly about the journey of life's lessons: happiness, sadness, loss, illness, family, work, success, love, divorce, dogs, friends, judgment, narcissism, pain, relationships, unconditional love, perspective, differences, death, addiction, acceptance, entitlement, and thank heavens humor! God love HUMOR!

In my writing i have been very candid and painfully honest about feelings. My writing has been my therapy. I have kept a diary/journal off and on most of my life. Blogging has been my way of, "over-sharing" in the name of an attempt to reach others and share life lessons. Maybe you will read my words and say -- "i get it".. or "me too!"

Ten years ago social media didn't really exist. It certainly didn't govern our lives and we didn't have to constantly check our screens to compare our lives to see if we, looked as good as someone else, or were having as much fun, or were as successful as our "friends"...or so it APPEARS.. Right??

Well today, i'm lying in bed taking the day off, feeling a little under the weather, for i did stand on snow in my cute little red boots -- freezing (after all i was going to Deer Valley, so i wanted to be fashionable, rather than warm, stupid mistake!).

Friday night I spent a great evening with Tandin, my youngest son, watching the aerial competition finals at Deer Valley. It was spectacular watching these athletes twist and turn through the air. The mountain was lit up, the cameras and subwoofer base beat was enough to make your heart pump a little faster. It was complete with a fireworks finale, everything was beautiful and surreal...And then the drudgery of fighting the drunken, impolite, self-center imbeciles, all clamoring to get on the shuttle back to Park City. We missed the first bus because Tandin was not willing to RUN to the bus, let's just say, he was a bit angered by me pulling on his sweat shirt because i wanted to get on that damn bus! We did manage to catch the second bus.


I suppose each time i write i try to "make a point" and this time is no different. I learn the most poignant things from my boys. Last night was no different. And here are the lessons from the night: 1) Suffer through even if you're a little cold and uncomfortable. Many do not have homes, and are cold all night. 2) Don't make your loved ones uncomfortable because of what YOU want. Was it really important that i get on the first bus? Nope, and pulling on Tandin's sweatshirt made him uncomfortable, for he is polite, and i was being self-centered and impatient. Thank God that my boy thinks enough of me to invite me to spend a Friday evening with him. Period. 3) Appreciate athletes that are disciplined enough to dedicate themselves to excel at something that make crowds of people gasp at their talent, guts and bravery. True excellence in anything takes absolute sacrifice.

I've learned many things from my boys. They are all so incredibly different. I work for my oldest son TJ, and god love his soul, he puts up with me being in his business (literally) day after day. I pinch myself because i am so lucky to get to work with him every day. He was my night in shining armor, he picked me up when i was down and I am in awe of his work ethic and integrity.

My tender Chase gets me to the core, and i get him - we are birds of a feather. I can truly say i have never known a more non-judgmental, selfless person than Chase, all i can say is his wife is a lucky lady and i am a blessed mom.

My baby, well he's not a baby anymore, he's such a deep human being, far beyond what my genes could have produced, and i'll keep him, and keep learning from him. He is emotionally and intellectually wise beyond his years. I am humbled to be his mom.